I have arrived safe and sound in Ghana. I am loving every minute. I will be updating you soon. In the mean time, please watch this video. My sister, Melina, is still in need of $6,000 to be fully funded for this race. I ask that you prayerfully consider supporting here. This would bless my team, Melina, and me incredibly!
We loaded our luggage onto the overhead shelves above our
seats around nine in the morning. What was once at the beginning an occupied
train car quickly became a sardine can of arms, legs, and faces. There were
families seated in plastic chairs in the walkway between the Catholic pew seats
that lined our backs. There were women with babies lying on straw mats they had
laid out under tables and seats. There were hammocks strung between the
shifting, moving train cars.
We watched, observed, and eventually partook in the communal
sharing of space, food, seating, drinking water, and conversation.
As the evening went on and the sunlight began to disappear
from the windows of the train, more and more people began to lay down newspaper
and cardboard boxes on the floor among the trash and the cockroaches - hoping
for some shut-eye on the brightly lit train.
One o'clock in the morning rolled around and all I could
bring myself to do was read the Word and listen to worship music through my
headphones. It is in times like these that I have found myself feeling closer
to the Lord and He begins to speak so gently, and I hear Him more easily, and
see Him more vividly.
"Matthew 25" (song) by Misty Edwards came flooding into my
ears and God began opening my eyes to a picture of His return. At the time, I
was one of three people awake on the train. I looked out to see everyone in a
deep, deep slumber. The Lord showed me that this is a picture of the human
race. The train represented life, mankind, and the world picking up speed into
the last days. Though their stop may be approaching, though Christ may be
returning, they slept into the night unaware and unprepared. Soon the
significance of the ratio of those asleep and those awake became incredibly
urgent, pressing, and required immediate attention. "Awake, awake oh sleeper!
"Remember, therefore, what you have received and heard; obey
it, and repent. But if you do not wake up, I will come like a thief, and you
will not know at what time I will come to you." Revelation 3:3
"3But understand this: If the owner of the house
had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch
and would not have let his house be broken into. 44So you also must
be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect
him." Matthew 24:43-44
I understood the full weight of responsibility that fell on
those who were awake. The funeral dirge began playing in my ears and my heart
began to break. The funeral dirge will begin sounding throughout the earth,
will I lament? Will I be moved to action? As I looked around the train I saw
those that were rapidly heading into their eternity.
Isaiah 63 came flashing into my mind,
His garments will be stained crimson! The hem of his clothing stained in blood.
He will tread through the blood of His children who have rejected Him, and it
will ravage His heart. He mourns and weeps over His children! How badly he
wants them to turn to Him! If they would only cry out to Him that He may save
them! How gut-wrenching this was to me! There is urgency like never before! I
heard a pastor this past Sunday quote the latest study done, a CONSERVATIVE
estimate of time when the entire human race will have heard the gospel: 2025 to
2032! He comes back when the gospel has reached every ear! He is
coming to take His children with Him who have their lamps filled with oil!
Intimacy with their Creator, their Father, their God! He entrusted US with the
responsibility to GO out into our backyards, our cities, our country and make
disciples, NOT CONVERTS, prove His will, heal the sick, cleanse the leper! We
are co-laborers with Him! Let us do our part! Let us be moved to action. Let us
pray for compassion. Let us do the will of our Father
And
now, brothers, we want you to know about the grace that God has given the
Macedonian churches. (or in this case...the Vietnamese churches*). Out of the
most severe trial (persecution*), their overflowing joy and their extreme
poverty welled up in rich generosity.
For I testify that they gave as much as they were able, and even beyond their ability. Entirely on their own, they urgently pleaded with us for the privilege
of sharing in this service to the saints.
v.
7: But just as you excel in everything – in faith, in speech, in knowledge, in
complete earnestness and in your love for us – see that you also excel in this grace of giving!
If I even began to share the testimonies of the generosity
that has been lavished upon us by the Vietnamese church, you would not have the
time or the energy to read through it all. I have not seen generosity like this
in all the Church, nor all my life. And contrary to my giving, there generosity
was beyond their ability!
Though I cannot share all, I do wish to share this one
testimony of a woman's love for the saints (or servants of Jesus Christ). This
beautiful woman of God, at age 29, is Han, or Hannah in ‘Aussie'. She was born
and lived in Vietnam, and
now currently resides with her family in Australia. We had met her a week or
two ago when serving at a church. She was so passionate and excited about what
we were doing with the Lord that she asked to join us and bless us along the
way. Our next trip was 18 hours north of our current location. Her family had a
guest house at the half way point that she opened up to us to stay for a few
days. She insisted
on taking us in to her home, blessing us with meals, taking us to the beach,
boat rides, and tourism for a few days so that we may rest from doing the
Lord's work. In the evenings her family members would come over in shifts and
we would worship with them and pray together. We were able to encourage them in
their walk and pour into them by the Spirit. We saw God move in so many ways.
This woman was ‘a complete stranger' yet a sister in Christ
that "pleaded
with us for the privilege of sharing in the service to the saints." When
we moved north with her and our team we were able to minister to churches with
her as our translator. She wept for the pastors and believers of Vietnam. She
cried out for what moves God to tears. Her heart for the brethren was stunning.
As I reflected on our ministry over this past month, God led
me to this passage. 2 Corinthians 8 has never been more alive in my life than
right now. I literally lived these
verses over the past month because of her, and the believers in Vietnam.
As I read into chapter 9 I began to see the Lord's heart in
this matter.
"Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap
sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each man
should give what
he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or of necessity,
for God loves a cheerful giver."
And...
"You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on
every occasion, and through your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God.
This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of GOD'S PEOPLE
but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the
service by which you have PROVED
YOURSELVES, men will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the
gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and
everyone else. And in their prayers for you their hearts will go out to you,
because of the surpassing grace God has given you. Thanks be to God for his
indescribable gift!"
I love how He lays it out here.
God says, ‘Okay,
here's the deal... Here is a spiritual law: if you sow in a stingy, frugal,
sparing way, that is what you will reap. If you sow generously you will reap
generously, plenty, abundantly.
Now,
I am just telling you how it works – you have freedom here. It is your
responsibility – you decide in your heart how you will give. No obligation, no necessity.
Though, I do encourage you to give for the benefit of others, and yourself. It reveals
obedience because it matches up with your confession – and others notice and
praise me. I want you to excel in this area just as much as I want you
excelling in faith, speech, knowledge, and complete earnestness and love for
others (2 Corinthians 8:7)! This is a gift and I want you to get it! Yet, I
will leave it up to you... your freedom, your choice, you decide in YOUR heart, and
I will love and provide for you either way you choose!
What a loving, gracious God. This compels me to give so much
more than if it was lawful for me to do so! God is ENTRUSTING me with His finances and the
responsibility to choose how I serve Him with it! I want to prove myself
faithful! I want to provide for the Saints! I want to take care of my family!
If His heart is with the poor, I want to be there with Him!
I have had more generosity poured out on me by complete
strangers this month then ever before and it has radically changed my world and
view of God. I want to be that for others! Do I not want to cause others to
glorify and praise God the way I have this past month?
What a beautiful God we serve. He chooses to use us.
This is a call of hope to
those who are bound. This is a battle cry of the victorious in Christ Jesus to
those who are discouraged and weary. Take heart! He is faithful to deliver. He
is mighty to save. These words we can sometimes throw around with such
lightness and carelessness, but the depth, power, demon-blowing, life-giving,
sustenance that they hold tells of who He is! He is mighty to save. He goes to
battle for us. He has promised to deliver us and He will not relent. He does
not grow weary in battle; He does not tire at the schemes of the Enemy. He is
strong and mighty. Victory is the only way it can end.
I have struggled with shame
since the ninth grade and kept picking it up along the way in growing strength.
Plagued with condemnation and guilt I spent most of my Christian life trying to
convince myself that there really is no condemnation for those who are in Christ
Jesus. Yet it never seemed to sink deep into the soil with the thorns of lies
that the enemy planted. They would choke out ever ounce of Truth. I could not
hear even the whisper of Truth through the yelling of the enemy. Half the time
that he would lie to me – I really wouldn't even put up much of a fight because
in my eyes, "he had a point."
Yet these very things drove
me away from deeper levels of intimacy with the God who calls me righteous and
holy because He is. Over these past few months I have spent much time in prayer
alone and with my team working out some of these things in my heart. I knew
full well in my head that what I believed was a lie but trying to convince
myself of Truth did not seem to work! I knew God was getting ready to move
because I could feel all these things rushing to the surface and beginning to
stir. I wanted it all out so bad but I knew in my Spirit to wait on His timing.
Well brethren, the time was
now. Today, which seemed like any other day to me, was the day that God moved
in a mighty way. Through a long chain of events – I lost it today. I cried my
eyes out this morning and then again this afternoon. What seemed like me losing
my mind was God trying to get me to a breaking point where He could move. The
second outburst of the day became my moment of freedom. As I bawled my eyes
out, sadness came pouring out of me in which I cannot describe the depth. All
the shame I had felt in all of time began to come pouring out of me and I began
finding it harder and harder to breath. Joshua, my team leader began to pray
over me and intercede for me as God did His mighty work of removing all the
shame, guilt, and condemnation that had hardened inside of me.
After minutes of prayer I
felt release and I began to just weep in exhaustion and thankfulness that I was
free. God set me free from something I was never called to carry, never called
to walk in. He is good. He is mighty to save. He sets the captives free. He
binds up the broken hearted. He claims freedom for His children. It doesn't
matter if you have gone to hell and back in this life, there is no pit to deep
that His loving hand cannot reach and pull you out of. There is no problem,
circumstance, or struggle too big for our God.
Please keep me in prayer as
I begin to strengthen my legs in walking in what feel like new Truths that are
as old as time, "There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,"
and, "My people shall never be put to shame." (Rom. 8:1 & Joel 2:26)
A special thanks to my leader and my 180 family. Josh, thank you for standing by our side in the valley and on the mountaintop. Thank you for your heart for this family. Brothers and Sisters, I love and thank you for fighting for me and with me as He works out my salvation! I love you!!!
Thank you to all of you who are praying for me at home! I can truly feel your prayers from here! Stacy, Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
We have begun the fifth month of this incredible race and life in Him. We have been here in Vnam for only a few days and it has been such an incredible beginning. I am so excited to see what He wants to do in and through us.
We are a group of *tourists* doing "charity" work throughout the country and studying Asian culture.
Today we went through the historic tunnels from the Vnam war. We crawled undrground and experienced some of the hidden places the people lived and moved in while in a time of war. Reflecting on the day I cannot help relate it to the way those who follow 'the way' live here in Vnam. Though there are some steeples that mark the map of this country, the Holie Spir-t moves in the undrground chirches that are invizible to those that oppose His work. They must stay hiddden; they must be invizible.
This country is in a time of war, but it is for souls. People here risk their lives for the sake of the g-spel.
A few days ago we were able to sit down with some incredible women who do His work here. They were able to share some amazing stories of those being heeled and 'numbers added daily'.
I was in awe of their stories. In my heart I was so hungry to be a part of what He is doing. I had a moment where I praid, 'I will do anything. If my life could be better spent doing this work - I will lay down all I want for my life in Chr-st. I know that establishing Your kingdom is of more importance, and it is about Your children.' My mind began opening up to an eternal frame - thinking and reflecting on what is of greater value. It was a moment of complete surrender. Though He has spoken to me many times on the things He has in store for me back home, and the things I am called to do in America, I surrendered it all to Him again - and am determined to be open to His best plan - the one in which He can use me most! Just then one of the women knelt down beside me and said,
"Do you want to see many sav-d?"
"Yes. I do." I said soberly.
She motioned the international symbol for a telephone. "Telephone," she said.
"I use the telephone. I call others, and when I get wrong incoming calls - He tells me what to say or prae. You don't have to go very far..."
I knew He was speaking directly to my heart. I have read SO much about the und-rground chirches all over the world. I have many times seen myself there, and longed to be used in that way. My pray-r went up that day and my head was filled with flashes of places like China, Vnam, and other cl-sed countries. He spoke to me in that moment letting me know that though He could use me in these places, but I would be of much greater value and impact in what He has called me to and what He has shown me about my future. He can use me effectively wherever He plants me back home. He can do creative, great, and amazing things through me when I return home. It excites me to think about these things!
It was such a simple thing, but it spoke volumes to me.
*VERY IMPORTANT: If you want to comment on my blog please screen your comments - using misspelled words or no key words at all. Thank you very much.*
Hi Everyone! It has been a month since I blogged last - due to location, we were not able to access internet and blog. My brain only begins to spin in attempting to summarize all the mighty works God has done in this past month. Here are some pictures that capture bits and pieces of the beautiful time we spent in a Cambodian village.
This is the beautiful countryside of a small village in Cambodia. This was by far my favorite month of the race. We spent the month teaching English and preaching the gospel. We lived in a church on stilts in a field of banana trees in our host's backyard. We learned so much about generosity and having a servant's heart from the families and friends we encountered. I will carry this place in my heart forever.
This is one of the four classes that I taught. Our classes met 5 days a week. We taught them English and shared the good news of Jesus Christ, and other stories from the Bible.
This is the classroom I spent all my time teaching in. Yes, that is a python in the cage under the whiteboard. Special guests also include; chickens, roosters, dogs, and bugs.
This is the only restaurant/cafe in the village. It was one mile from our host's home. We walked here nearly every day for coffee and we would visit friends we had met at the market.
These are some of the amazing women that we came to love from the church. We would take turns preaching every Sunday at the adult and children services. After church we would spend time eating and laughing with them!
The two women in this picture, Changhon, and Phalla, the woman in the background, melted my heart. I cried my eyes out when we said our goodbyes.
This is Lenin. This woman, only 24 years old, taught me true servanthood. I will forever be changed by her life, her desire to serve and put herself last.
Right now the whole squad is in Hua Hin, Thailand for our 2nd debrief. We are spending five days here and then moving to our next location. I will update you on our next country, our "Ask The Lord" month, as soon as I can.
Nang, I know you won't read this. I know you cannot even read English, let alone fully understand my ridiculous attempt to speak it slowly and simply.
However, I still find the need to express the raging thoughts in my heart and mind tonight as I anticipate what the Lord is about to do in your life.
I cannot even claim this as a poem for it is literally a pile of my unedited thoughts hours past my bed time. I cannot formulate thoughts, or words. This is all I have...
It feels as if hours have passed in only minutes time.
Waiting, waiting, waiting for the bride to enter the doorway.
Waiting for the doctor to unveil the news.
Anticipation building, and building.
Restless sleep before seeing my father for the first time in years.
Watching the minute hand during a test I feel unprepared for.
Watching my swollen belly with my husband as I wait for her to kick.
Watching for headlights in the driveway after curfew.
Telling someone you love them and feeling the silence cover your body if only for a few seconds.
Waiting. Waiting.
Waiting.
Is this the feeling He has when He extends His hand to us?
I feel the need to pace. Or stare. Or think. Or not think. How does one clear their mind?
And then this faint whisper... wait... on the Lord.
Wait on the Lord. Commit it into My hands. Rest in Me.
okay.
It is 2:40 in the morning. I think it is time to fall asleep.
He will see her through. He will see her through. He is faithful. He will see her through.
How
is it that the heart of my faith, the greatest act of love, and the center
point of all that my life is meant to embody, can be the most misunderstood in
my life? Grace is such a vital necessity
to my walk, yet foreign and undiscovered in many areas of my heart and life.
It takes multiplying revelation to open my
eyes wider, and my heart further to receive the infinite depth of His grace. And
the degree to which I receive His grace is the limited measurement in which I
can give it.
I
see now that this is a revelation that I cannot live without and one that I
have not desperately pursued.
God
brought me to this quote that still stuns me after four years of being a
Christian. I have this incredible need to be constantly reminded of grace, as
if I lose sight of it every time.
"In
one of his last acts before death, Jesus forgave a thief dangling on a cross,
knowing full well the thief had converted out of plain fear. That thief would
never study the Bible, never attend a synagogue or church, and never make
amends to all those he had wronged. He simply said "Jesus, remember me," and
Jesus promised, "Today you will be with me in paradise." It was another
shocking reminder that grace does not depend on what we have done for God but
rather what God has done for us."
-Phillip
Yancey
I'm
in such awe of grace. Even more so of the One who bestows it. I am at the very
beginning of the journey into understanding grace, but I thought I would share
of my travels.
Trials.
To our error we are quick to replace this word with false meaning. When we are
tried in our lives we can come under the illusion that we need reformed
circumstances. God’s end goal for the trials we face is not perfect
circumstances, for He is not especially concerned with our comfort. His desire, first and foremost, is to change what is within us, not around us.
At
the point of greatest intensity in the heat of the Refiner’s fire our true
perception of God makes its way to the surface. We will begin feeling anxiety, stress, or fear if our view of Him is not Truth, or in line with His Word. We make the mistake of trying to fix the
problem instead of fixing the perception we have of our God.
We
must draw near to the Father so that He may replace our faulty view of Him with
His redeeming Truth. We must ask Him to reveal the way we truly see Him, so that He
may correct it. When we have revelation of who He is, by it we see everything
else. His truth completely transforms the way we view our world and all that it holds.
This includes our trials.
It is not about our circumstances. It is about our relation to Him in the
midst of them. We see this so clearly in the life of Job. Job
loved and feared the Lord. Yet, God saw within his heart the way Job actually
saw Him. The Lord allowed the enemy to work against his life, with restrictions.
As
Job’s fiery trials raged against his life, the beliefs in his heart began to
rise to the surface. He cried, “It profits a man nothing that he should delight
in God.” God
replied through His servant Elihu and says,
“Job
speaks without knowledge, his words are without wisdom. Oh, that Job were tried
to the utmost, because his answers are like those of wicked men!” Job 34:35-36
The
fire had revealed a false perception of who God is. And through his distorted view of God, Job saw all things. Then,
God revealed Himself to Job. He challenged Job’s perception of Him and replaced
it with Truth. Job cried out, “I have heard of You by the hearing of
the ear, but now my eye sees you.” Job repented and the Lord restored to
him twice what he had lost.
In
First Peter, chapter one, it says,
6In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have
had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so
that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined
by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when
Jesus Christ is revealed. 8Though you have not seen him, you
love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are
filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9for you are
receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
In
verse one of this chapter, Peter refers to his audience as ‘strangers of this
world.’ When we renew our minds so that they are set on the eternal, the
unseen, then our circumstances are irrelevant compared with the revelation of
who He is. Thank God He is more concerned with our eternal well-being than than the temporal!
17For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
I
pray that we as the body can be content in all things, trust in all things, and
put our full confidence in Him, because we know who our God is. I pray that our
eyes, like Job, see Him. And that we are able to rejoice, that through trials and tribulations, we have greater revelation of the person Jesus Christ.
